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Oneness of man, woman and marriages

Marriages

The Lord our God created the Heavens, the earth, the seas and everything upon them including a man. In Genesis 2:18  reads: Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him”. Verse 21 proceeds to say: So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh; and the rib which the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.

It is evident that the male and female of humanity came from one source, ie from the Lord God’s first creation of a man. The “man” acknowledged the creation of the other being, brought forth from his rib through the engineering works of God, saying; “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman (‘ishshah’ in Hebrew), because she was taken out of Man.” This statement clearly means that man and woman are of one product, of same bones and flesh.

“Man” can only claim seniority based on the assumption that he was created first. Among siblings, seniority is based on who was born first, although there is equality of all children of one family. There is no lesser child among them all, whether it’s male or female. They are all born of the same bones and the same flesh. However, from the dawn of time, the oneness of man and woman has been punctured by this misplaced idea that a woman is lesser being than a man. I still remember vividly that a while back, the laws in many countries and societies including that of our own, did not permit a woman to be independent enough to sign legally binding documents without the consent of husbands or “‘guardians”, regardless of their ages. How does a person of the same bones and flesh become a different quality of a human being?

When God said the man needed a helper, he did not mean to say the woman should be like a slave to the man. What He meant was that the he and she were to work together as one to achieve desired results. Man and woman are meant to be like a team, each performing functions which bring some coordination to the run of things. In a football or other team, we have players who act as attackers, defenders, midfielders or goalkeepers etc, each according to talent and coordinating with one another to achieve a set result in their favour. They are all equals within the team during play.

Like in the team, there are some roles in society that are more suited for males and others more suitable for the females, all linked with each other to achieve desired overall objectives. That should not belittle the roles of the females, nor for other males. We are of one equal person regardless of what each of us can do. Males and females come together to achieve reproduction and the multiplication of each of their respective species. It is a coordinated process requiring oneness of functionality. The two are brought together into one unit.

Our scriptures have this to say (Genesis 2:24-25): Therefore, a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked, and were not ashamed.

On marrying, man and woman “become one flesh”. In other words, they become one body; not ashamed of seeing each other in their naked form. Being of one body, they perform different functions for their upkeep or survival, just as the eyes of the body allow us to see, the ears of the body let us hear things, the hands performs some manual tasks, the legs allow us to stand up and walk, the tongue to taste and the nose to smell etc. The husband’s best friend should be his wife, and a wife’s best friend should be her husband because they are meant to be one. Anyone who comes in between the two is like a disease; a foreign object that contaminates that oneness. Roles of husbands and wife differ from the one area to the other. There is no breadwinner without the other. Finances should operate from one pot, as one family. Incomes and expenditures should have one ledger book, within one home.

We are all born of a father and a mother. Apart from the Lord our God, these two people should be the most important people in a person’s life. However, it is declared in our scriptures that parents should step aside to allow married children to be united as one with their chosen spouses. The children should move out of their parent’s homes to start their own families elsewhere. A spouse should not cling to his/her parents after marriage. That umbilical cord should be broken, without necessarily cutting off the parent/child relationship. Likewise the parents should not cling onto their sons or daughters after marriage. They should allow them to form a new family and paternity. Although they may offer their elderly advice, the parents should refrain from interfering or running the lives of their married children. They acquire divine independence the moment they get married. Married children are in oneness with their spouses.

I detest nations that treat women as second class citizens. I abhor parents who give preferential treatment to their sons above the daughters. I disagree with the notion that men are superior to women. I condemn any form of discrimination against women. Women are as intelligent as the men. We are equals as ones born of the same bones and of the same flesh. Amen.

l Prosper Tingini is the scribe of the Children of God Missionary Assembly — God’s messengers. Contact details: Mobile/WhatsApp: 0771 260 195. Email address: ptingini@gmail.com 

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