BY DOCTOR STOP IT My Dear People
The funeral of Johane Marange apostolic sect leader Noah Taguta showed us why the Lacoste gangster believes their survival depends on these “white garment churches”.
It was also a time for reflection for us.
Gushungo, May His Soul Rest In Peace, even though he was a proud Catholic, also held the apostolic sects in high regard because they became unquestionably loyal to him.
Once in a while he would trade his Saville Row suits for the white garments to visit the shrines, especially in the eastern parts of the country.
For the apostolic sects, Gushungo was the Angel Gabriel incarnate, hence they worshipped him.
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Who remembers my G40 boys boasting at one of my popular rallies that the Bobstar would be vetting those who qualified to pass through the gates of heaven?
Where are they now? The likes of Chipanga. I hear poverty forced him to return to that party.
Kkkkk I am digressing, but my point is that the coup gang is proving my prophecy that Gushungo will rule you from the grave true.
They are actually outdoing him in several aspects to the extent that they are deifying leaders of apostolic sects in desperation for votes.
Launchmore accorded a state assisted funeral to Taguta “in recognition of his contribution to the spiritual and material well-being of the nation.”
“His commitment to the Word and his exceptional leadership, through which our country Zimbabwe is now a well-known spiritual epicentre of the African continent,” they claimed.
Of course they forgot to mention the scourge of child marriages that is associated with some of Taguta’s followers.
The case of the 14-year-old Anna Machaya, who died during child birth at the Johane Marange shrine last year, is still fresh in our minds.
Poor Anna had been married off to one of the leaders of the sect, we are told.
Taguta’s followers are said to have done all they could to hinder police investigations into Anna’s death by preventing the exhumation of her remains at the shrine.
But the owners of this country will see no evil and hear no evil when it comes to those sects.
Stranger than fiction Stories about how Taguta’s funeral was handled were mind boggling as much as they were sad.
They say some sect leaders spent two days bathing his body with hot water while preparing for his “resurrection”.
His death was allegedly kept a secret for two days “after fervent efforts to bring him back to life failed”.
The sect leaders were so confident that he would resurrect they blocked Taguta’s sons from accessing their father’s body as they did rituals, kkkk.
In the end they had to bury a decomposing body!
Then you wonder why Gushungo ruled you for 39 years, until those cowards put him under house arrest. Munopengaaaa!
A propaganda gift The not so young CCC handed the clueless Lacoste gangsters a propaganda gift by deploying a team to attend the Independence Day celebrations in Bulawayo last week.
Suddenly spent forces such as Joji and the former nurse found something to do with their lives as they took to Twitter to celebrate the CCC “Damascus moment”.
Launchmore is desperate for endorsement by anyone, including by those who can’t garner votes even from their own spouses such as Rinda, and the CCC presence at the celebrations definitely stroked his ego.
An important lesson that CCC should have drawn from that episode is that you cannot let an opponent dictate the agenda for you.
Nero should have just deployed the party’s 19 new MPs to deliver his independence message in the constituencies that the party now hold to consolidate the March 26 victory.
The trip to Bulawayo left Mukomana’s trusted lieutenants such as Hwende thoroughly confused.
Hwende became the butt of jokes on Twitter after he claimed that “Brother Leader (Muammar Gaddafi was) killed for the unity of Africans (United States of Africa) and a common African currency (Gold Dinar).
“We must continue pushing for these dreams and end the dominance of the US$.”
A purported democrat eulogising a dictator like Gaddafi, my foot!
The strongest currency
Talking of the dominance of the US dollar, Launchmore is no longer hiding his frustration about the collapse of the Zimbabwe dollar as he lashes on everyone he believes is fuelling the collapse of the RTG as he called it a few years ago.
Yesterday while addressing Zanu PF victory celebrations in Epworth, he claimed that some unnamed countries were sabotaging the local currency.
He claimed a clampdown against corporates for allegedly manipulating the Zimbabwe dollar, but even a herd boy in Dotito will tell you the reason why we are witnessing the second death of the currency is poor stewardship of the economy.
The rampant corruption, huge national debt, Mangudya and Mthuli’s dysfunctional foreign currency auction system are the elephant in the room.
The quicker Launchmore understands this the better for him. He will avoid going the same way as Gushungo.
They thought running a country was easy as drinking whisky, kkkkk.
Gushungo is certainly having the last laugh watching the Crocodile fumble with the economy and even trying to keep his Zanu PF intact in the face of mounting hardships, kkkkkk.
Munopengaaa!!!
Gushungo Chete Chete!
Dr Amai Stop it! PhD (Fake)