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Foundational principles of training up children

Opinion & Analysis
The good thing about humanity is that her Creator gave her methods and ways of raising up her offspring.

The good thing about humanity is that her Creator gave her methods and ways of raising up her offspring.

By Kilton Moyo

The tragedy though is that humanity has no confidence in God’s methods, but opts for man-made ways that fall far short from producing that which God expects from humanity.

You will agree with me, if you can, that human culture itself has fallen into debauchery and anarchy. If you are wise enough, you will realise that the world over is in need of only one thing, the word of God.

The word of God is the only thing that is medicine to all things. The family needs this medicine. Marriage needs this medicine.

Individuals need this medicine. Parenting these days need this medicine more than ever before.

Today, I want to explore with you a few basics or foundational principles in parenting. Many parents are finding it hard to train up their children.

In many families, there is no training at all, but everything is left to chance. Many parents are clueless, but then suffer from serious pride and cannot seek help.

There are three reasons why most of us are not training up our children or even disciplining them.

I have mentioned one above, lack of confidence in God’s methods. God demands discipline.

The pain we experience when the child is crying while being disciplined. Please disciplining is not just beating like you might think.

Finally, the parent’s laziness in disciplining or training up children. These have hurt so many families and will continue to. Proverbs 19:18 says that when you are doing this, you are participating in your child’s death.

I wonder how many of us are not guilty of this sin of destroying our own.

I can tell you my beloved that it is better for the child to cry under loving correction than for you the parent to cry under the shame of the fruit of failed discipline.

As parents, look around us today and you will see the fruit of our failure everywhere. There is need for repentance and then going back to God’s ways.

Set an example as a parent

We train first and foremost by our on example as parents. The example of life we show to our children is the greatest teacher you can find.

Our own realities as parents matter the most and shape the attitudes in young lives. Remember that little children learn by observation and imitation. They imitate you in all you do. Never think that is just childish. It is forming their lives. It is important.

Most of us are found wanting here. We are reckless in our deeds, personalities, character and words.

You can never afford such when raising up children. Every parent produces after them. Who are you? That is what you will produce and this is biblical.

Be dedicated to the training as a parent

How dedicated are you to your child? This is a way of training up children. You will not invest if you are not dedicated or committed to their growth, discipline, character and future. Both the parent and the child must be dedicated to each other.

Training someone from scratch is not an easy thing. It needs discipline on your part. It needs patience. I think frankly speaking, you need the Holy Spirit to guide you. You will not see the fruit as soon as you wish, but keep training. Keep the commitment. The challenge with this generation is that we give up easily.

Have the boldness to give accurate instructions

Training is about giving instruction. Instruction is, therefore, the important content in training. Do not be afraid to admonish, and instruct. Children need guidance and you are better off giving instruction about the way they should go. Start them up on this way and then let them discover to learn as they grow.

Meanwhile be by their side to give the necessary instruction. Sometimes they get upset about the instruction but that is the way of life and growing up. Training is never a nice thing, but is all we need in this life.

Giving instruction results in education and not resentment, as the world would want you to think. It provides everything necessary for training children.

Instil all-round discipline

The world likes to complicate this method of training up children. Most human rights movements must be understood of what they are, anti-Christ agents.

Most of them are financed to take people away from anything that is of God into a total humanistic world, where God is not the issue.

They will always tell you disciplining a child is abuse. They expose their serious ignorance on what disciplining is all about.

Beating is not the only side of disciplining. There is nothing wrong with beating a child here and there to enforce compliance and obedience. Never be fooled. Of course, some of us abuse this and abuse children. Beloved there is hope for every child in the world and this hope is in their discipline.

Discipline is a process and not just an event. Be committed to the process. Discipline includes words and actions. Your own words as a parent promote discipline or indiscipline. The same with your actions.

Disciplining includes encouraging the child. It includes affirming the child. I do not have enough time to write all on this issue alone.

No parent enjoys an indisciplined child. They are a sore to any eye. A child who is not disciplined at home will act their indiscipline in public.

Wait until they become drama in a supermarket. Have you seen some? I have seen embarrassed parents begin to reward indiscipline and disobedience just to try and stop the drama.

That is a sad day when you allow such as a parent and hope to bring up a responsible person.

Do it all in love

Love does not reward disobedience. I have seen many young parents who reward disobedience by stupid leniency on a child who is acting up. Love does not participate in a wrong. Love corrects and encourages.

We have a generation that cannot be corrected. They mock correction and instruction and run themselves to destruction.

As a parent, do not fool yourself and your child by letting them do what they want and think its love. In fact, it is foolishness.

You are being a coward. Play your part well. Your duty is to instruct and correct and let them choose for themselves.

Love disciplines. Love desires the best for you all. If we do not discipline them while young, we will fight them when they are grown-ups.

Truth be told, many lie dead in graves because they mocked correction and others were never corrected. It is sad. We are living in a time when we just have to go back to God about everything in this life.

We just have to swallow our pride, acknowledge our mistakes as parents and humans and then set ourselves to correcting things.

I am no longer bothered about my past mistakes. Then I did not know what I know now.

I look to the future more than I look to history and because of that I would rather help millions now and in the future.

You are free to follow us on our Facebook, Twitter and blogs for more information and ideas. You can also invite us to your seminars or attend our seminars.

We desire being a blessing to the family in the continent. You can also get our books from our online store at www.kiltonmoyoinspirations.com.