IT’S 2:30pm on a Saturday in Hwedza, Mashonaland East and a Presidential aspirant is seen building a makeshift toilet behind his shop, which is also his home and his party’s headquarters.
BY MOSES MATENGA
As Zimbabwe continues with its economic free fall, the aspiring President claims to have keys to the economic quagmire that has condemned the country’s citizens into poverty and the means to ensure President Robert Mugabe, whom he addresses as “Mr.
Mugabe”, in the interview, finally calls it a day.
He claims the President’s loyalists promised him a chieftaincy if he supported Mugabe’s bid to become Prime Minister ahead of Abel Muzorewa after the short-lived, Zimbabwe-Rhodesia, but is now angry and bitter that the promise has not been fulfilled.
He says the ancestors are angry and he does not rule out bloody clashes.
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The politician now wants to change things to ensure that Zimbabweans can finally see Mugabe’s back.
Viewed as a comic character by many, Egypt Tazarurwa Dzinemunenzva is clad in a sky-blue Copac T-shirt tucked into a pair of navy blue trousers and is walking around barefooted.
The 65-year-old father of 13 and husband of two wives is angry with “Mr Mugabe”.
The news team is greeted by a dysfunctional tractor and a Peugeot pick-up truck that he lists as some of his properties, as they enter his premises.
In front of his shop, there is a big post written African National Party (ANP) headquarters.
Part of the building houses a huge grinding mill and a take-away shop, which sells peanut butter.
In the backyard is a bicycle and a wheelbarrow that have seen better days.
After arriving unannounced, Dzinemunenzva stands in awe, surprised by the “guests”, who introduce themselves as journalists — and felt it would be improper to pass by without paying the Presidential hopeful a courtesy call — he opened up for a discussion.
He relayed a colourful tale of how he was responsible for Mugabe’s rise and was angry because of unfulfilled promises, and now he wanted to “visit the mountains” to ensure Mugabe surrenders power.
The eccentric Dzinemunenzva, trowel in hand, is building a backyard toilet which is almost done.
He accuses Mugabe of being a dictator who betrayed him.
“I was told that they did not want Muzorewa and the people wanted Mr Mugabe. They asked, ‘can you support us?’ They knew I could do it because they were told in 1960, while I was in Mutare. I said to them, give me a reason why I should support you, then they said after the elections, after we won, I was going to be given a paramount crown and become a paramount chief, but this was not done,” he said.
“I signed the Lancaster agreement for the blood spilled during the war. Mr Mugabe, Ndabaningi Sithole, Joshua Nkomo and Smith signed for the political issues. I want to tell you this, I want to be open. I want to be frank and very straight. I made a mistake when I signed that concession.”
However, there is no record of the oddball politician being part of the Lancaster House talks.
Dzinemunhenzva claimed he knew a place he could go on to unlock the value in the country, but vehemently refused to disclose it, saying: “That one is confidential, sorry to say. That can’t happen because Mr Mugabe… l know him.”
Dzinemunenzva said he had a secret that he would only release after his electoral victory in 2018, as he feared Mugabe would steal his ideas.
“That vision, l can’t tell you now, Mr Mugabe will implement it. I will not release the secret until l am elected in 2018, l will definitely contest in 2018. I will tell people at my rallies about it,” he said.
“Mugabe did wrong by ignoring me. There is a Russian book that says when they are at the bottom they need your advice, but reject it when they are at the top. l made a mistake to grant Mr Mugabe that concession.”
Dzinemunenzva shared his concern over the disappearance of journalist-cum-activist, Itai Dzamara and recalled his own abduction by State agents years ago, where he escaped, with the guidance of a spirit by walking 12 hours from Marondera to his home.
“We are worried about the disappearance of the journalist, we have that information,” he said.
However, NewsDay could not independently verify whether he had ever been abducted.
He spoke of the proposed opposition coalition to topple Mugabe, but insisted his party would not be part of that.
“They know some of them have become unpopular so they want relevance in those coalitions, we will not be part of that,” Dzinemunenzva said.
He brags of his wealth, a small tractor that seems to have been parked for ages and that he had sold a shop to finance other investments.
Like any other politician, Dzinemunenzva speaks of his foreign policy and his disdain for the Chinese, who he accused of looting the country’s resources including diamonds.
“I don’t support China. They are looting money as we speak. As an example, we have Chiadzwa, they say machines are down and can only be repaired in China. They then load diamonds and fly them out of the country, I have research on that,” he said, making more outlandish claims, reiterating his earlier claims that ancestors were angry.
Dzinemunenzva, who has successfully registered to contest presidential elections over the years only to pull out at the last minute, insists he will win the 2018 elections.
He tells NewsDay of his investments and lists a passport as one of them and would use for his foreign travels that will commence soon.
Dzinemunenzva claims Zanu PF has been holding onto money given to him by donors, declaring he wanted it back.
“I have money that came from Sadc, it’s there in my phone for almost six months now. We will contest all posts, President, Senators, MPs and councillors in 2018. We want to look at how much that will cost,” he said.
Whether Dzinemunenzva will join former Uruguay leader Jose Mujica as the world’s poorest President come 2018, or he just enters the political arena to provide the much-needed comic relief, only time will tell.